Rest Well Calaveri
If Never Give Up was a person..
It would be my mother. There are many attributes about her but i will share a few things about her.
My mother retired from public service when she was only 45 or there about. She mentioned how this was a rare thing at the time and that there were efforts to stop her early retirement.
She had survived the retrenchment exercise that was carried out by the government in the early 90s. Infact many of her contemporaries chose to go back to school and upgrade their education as a means to secure their employment.
I want to think that, she held on till she had her own house. I remember coming back from school that year and we found that she had moved houses. To an incomplete structure that we called home.
She has since completed it but i want to.share the things i remember that are the reason for the title of this blog.
1. She tried every business possible to make ends meet. When i watched Eunice Adubango’s business nuggets and how she has run 13 businesses, my mind went to one other woman that has gone this same direction. My mother.
2. She is very disciplined with what she eats. When she embarks on a journey, she will only stop when she gets to her destination.
3. She walks very long distances. She has a resilience that i cant comprehend. She mentioned how she opted to walk to work to save money the moment she started saving for a house. On several occasions she has walked to where i work simply because she is too impatient to waste time in Kampala jam.
4. It is possible that she has been awarded more than 100 trophies from playing badminton and swimming over the years. Once she broke her wrist on the court and i thought surely, she will never return to the court. I can confirm that she has played badminton since then.
I am reminded of a motto for one of the schools that is admired greatly. Gayaza High School. It says “Never Give Up” This Gayaza old girl personifies this Motto. She just never gives up.
This is the end of my story.
Modern day chariots
The other day i started researching about chariots, their types and the general purpose they served. I learnt that they were used as a means of transport. Transport for royalty or battalions, they served to move an individual or army from one place to another.
I have caught myself trusting in modern day chariots. A bank balance that could solve global problems, family and friends, an education, political position, a loving spouse are good things to have. Infact they are great things to have for they serve a purpose.
But how much do we trust them and have there been times when these trusted things didnt come through for us?
I had relied on someone to do something for me. I even reasoned that since there was a benefit for them, they would diligently do as i wanted. How wrong i was.
A friend of mine shared how she was sure her savings would enable her construct a house on a plot of land she already had.
A mother that was yearning for a baby stopped taking any contraception with surredness that a pregnancy would follow right after.
A transcript thats shows a diligent student but the graduate remains without a job for over 10 years.
I could go on and on about such instances that didnt work out as planned.
Truth is like a chariot relies on round wheels, a horse and a rider, and a system that holds all components together, trusting in things beside God is a frail position.
Psalm 20:7-8 MSG and TPT spell out the outcome of trusting chariots. There is a limitation in chariots. They have a human component. On its own a chariot has no direction save for the human that is riding it. Without a wheel, it will not move. Its horses can go lame. But those who trust in God go far. They are like Mt. Zion. They can not be shaken but endure forever. They find victory.
Psalm 20:7-8The Message
7-8 See those people polishing their chariots,
and those others grooming their horses?
But we’re making garlands for God our God.
The chariots will rust,
those horses pull up lame—
and we’ll be on our feet, standing tall.
So what chariots are you trusting? Which horses are you grooming? This question calls for self reflection. Relinquish your cares to God and you will be amazed at the outcome.
That house can be built by God. Conceiving a child is by God. That job is by God. Whatever you desire, by God you have it. So speak to Him. Call Forth what you desire and Trust in the Name of God.
This is the end of my sermon. Get a good bible based church, keep God first place and you will be amazed at what He will do in your life.
This is the end of my sermon
Is your vacuum cleaner bag plugged in? How full is it?
Let me explain why i ask. Many years ago, when we returned from boarding school, we found that dad had acquired a vacuum cleaner. I remember it was orange in colour with black wheels and black pipe. Ofcourse we had seen it in movies, knew what it did and were excited to plug into power to use the machine.
What i did not understand was why it kept releasing dust every time i used it to clean the carpet.
All this time, there was this khaki bag in the box whose purpose i didnt know. I later learnt that this bag sits in the vacuum cabin and it collects all the dust and other things that are blown by the cleaner. (This i learnt much later, after i left my parents home. Kale much later.)
I cant remember if there was a manual in the box that housed the cleaner. I dont think i had the sense to read the instructions. (Now i do read manuals)
The vacuum story is sometimes how we go through life. We try to clean up the messes in out lives and end up creating more messes.
We want to stop doing bad things but have not fixed the vacuum bag inside the cleaner and so as we blow away dust from the floor, the pressure of the cleaner releases the dust into the air making even a bigger mess.
I have been in this situation before with my finances, my relationships. Maybe you too have.
It doesn’t always have to be like this. Might i make suggestions on a few steps that could guide your use of a vacuum cleaner aka project clean up your life.
1. After admitting your faults, pray to God for a solution.
2. When you get a vacuum cleaner, please read the manual. Its that ‘hard to read’ document that will inevitably save you the hassle of blindly forging through life. That manual is also called BIBLE. It has answers to everything. I mean everything.
3. Insert the vacuum bag in the cleaner to trap all the dirt that is blown off the carpet. This vacuum bag could mean, changing the people you hang out with, paying your debt and avoiding spending sprees. It could mean joining a few enrichment classes to gain knowledge in an area that’s going to transform your life. (Think deeply about what you want to change and what the vacuum bag represents.
4. Remember to empty the vacuum bag. Let the dirt go to where it belongs. In the rubbish pit. (Fill in the missing words)
5. If you still cant discern how to use the vacuum cleaner, ask someome for help. You dont want to dispose a good machine just because you cant get the hang of it.
This is the end of my story.
My dear boys….
Zachary, Donald and T.H, this year is just half way but lots of things have happened.
When you are older, i hope you can read this blog and possibly tell this story to your own boys.
So in 2020, the World was faced with a disease. This disease had no cure and quite a number of people were affected by the disease itself and in some cases its effects.
1. Church TV
Can you imagine, churches, mosques in Uganda being closed for over 2 months? Even as i type this, Watoto church, our church is closed. On a good note though, We still have the privilege of congregating in our sitting room and praying and dancing to church music in church clothes. Our Watoto service is relayed on NBS TV right after the Catholic service for St Charles Lwanga Ntinda.
On a great note, we were introduced to taking Body and Blood (Holy Communion)at home.
2. Curfew
Hmmm, imagine in that year, a curfew was introduced. We had to get home by 7.00pm. It was actually a crime to be out of home after this time.
3. Salary cuts and job losses.
Because some businesses and offices were closed, hard times hit on several fronts. Traders could not open shops, donor funded projects were halted since access to transport and communities were greatly hindered. In this time, not much economic activity was going on and the ripple of no money hit companies. Ugandans lost jobs, some companies instituted salary cuts, some people lacked food and neccessities. In this season, though times were tough, We saw the hand of God, people shared food, but mostly, we saw the need to diversify our income sources. As an instruction, my dear boys, do not settle for one source of income. Multiple, multiple, multiple sources of income shall be what you have and what you teach your children.
4. Social distancing
Did i tell you about social distancing? So one of the ways Corona used to spread was through touching of surfaces. The virus would stick to surfaces and so many people could actually get infected by congregating. WHO sent guidelines on how many metres people were to stand apart from each in public places like banks, hospitals. In those days when the lock down was instituted, one needed a pass to go to hospital. Can you imagine? There were limitations on gatherings like weddings, burials and the like. A wedding ceremony had to have only 10 people, burial too though this was gradually eased.
Sports activities were suspended for a while. The Premier league,NBA, and other contact sport was put on hold. Which meant that even gatherings at Stadiums were stopped. Once the lock down on sports was lifted, restrictions were put on how many people could attend these games. So the genius minds in football decided to play stadium noise and sounds to give the players an illusion of a supporting crowd. Things we had never seen before.
5. Mummy at CPS
So on one of those partial lock down days, i was driving to work and a police man waived me down. “This one, take to CPS- Central Police Station.” He instructed another police man. Just like that, i was instructed to drive to CPS, and hand in my keys. I handed them the keys amidst tears. I remember your Grand pa pleading with the police man to release me. To no avail. My car wss later released. To this day, i wonder what i had done. Many people on their way to work were treated the same way.
Anyway, amidst all these, God has been amazing. Zachary has been having classes on zoom. Do you know that his school has asked us to pay a full term’s fees?
So much to write about. But i hope in all things you know that I Love You and always will. I will remind you of other things when we read this blog together in 2040.
If i were a father…( my thoughts based on Bluey’s dad
I am a fan of Bluey- an Australian cartoon. So Bluey has a dad, mom and a sister called Bingo. My children know i love this cartoon so they call me once its showing. I would love to tell you why i love this cartoon in Honor of Father’s day.
In all the episodes i have watched, i see a father that is many things. So i will list them here.
1. Bluey’s dad is fun. He has allowed himself to be a part of his children’s lives. Took me a while to realise, the make believe scenes are mostly staged in the house. Be it a bus drive, an aeroplane ride, he is there being silly with his children.
2. I often see him being many things to them. Sometimes, he is a punching bag( i say this lovingly coz i dont know what to call it). Sometimes, he allows them to struggle so they can learn independence. Sometimes he will allow mistakes and laugh about them so his children learn to not take life too seriously. He works.(oba where, coz in one episode he couldnot play coz he had to go to work.
3. Bluey’s dad has allowed his children to see him relate with their mother in a loving way. He literally takes care to engage the children while mom prepares meals or goes for a baby shower. Without knowing, he is setting a standard for their spouses.
I love Bluey’s dad. He effectively paints the picture of God. He is different things in different scenarios yet he is the same God. Fun, loving, kind, centre of the children yet still God.
Have you watched Bluey before? Are you wondering as a father what kind of dad your children need? Make a date to watch Bluey. Thank me later.
That is the end of this story.
Gratitude note to the heroes in my family
Gratitude note
On a Monday like this 1 year ago, my helper at the time decided to leave feigning that one of her relatives had died and she was going for burial and would return after a few days. I bid her farewell and even handed her money to facilitate her and her family in this time. You would think that by now, after going through several maids that I suspected she was lying. Even if I did, how could I say no to someone who was clearly distraught?
Anywho, the real story is this one.
So it is 2 weeks after the birth of Theo my 3rd born. It was a successful delivery and it was a C-section. Here I was with a baby, as well as my other school going children and the term had just begun. In the midst of my troubles, God placed women of valour around me to share my load.
My mother had moved in with us to help out as she usually does when one of us has a child. I will never forget these words.” Give me the baby and go to sleep”. They are golden words. If you know, you know. She cooked, cleaned and cooked some more. I was grateful to have her around.
My sister who lives a stone’s throw of me always came to prepare my boys for school in the morning. She instructed her helper to take on some of my household’s load. I will never forget the mighty army of helpers that God availed me as we continued our search for a replacement. She made sure I made it for doctor’s appointments, even drives around home just so I could change environment.
My other sisters and brothers checked in on us, some washing clothes, others just lifting child so I could get some sleep. I look back with so much gratitude amidst the pain in that season.
Truth is, I kept a grudge in my heart. This was after I discovered that she had actually gone to another home to work there. I didn’t wish her well. I was angry and hurt that she chose such a time to leave.
Of course I later found help and some normalcy returned to our home. I didn’t forgive this girl till recently.
It dawned on me that I would continue hurting myself if I didn’t let this girl go. I finally forgave her and prayed a blessing over her. I got the guts to call her recently but she had since changed her number. I just wanted to let her know how we were and how the baby was and inquire after her.
What am I saying? I am grateful for family, for my family. For selflessness, for love and provision. For brothers that sacrifice time just to be by your side when you are unwell. For parents who call in just to check on us. For in-laws that love. For work mates that took moments from work to come check on us. For fruitful wombs. For fleet administrators at work that keep checking on us. For cell members who check in.
It’s a year since this happened and am grateful to God for how far he has brought us.
This is the end of this story.
She just would not let it rest -How my mother taught me the skill of swimming
I was about 3 years when i had a near drowning incident at a swimming pool. I was told by my mother that i lent another child my floater while i was in the pool even though i was on the shallow end of the pool. This was not a children’s pool and so i was still too short and my feet could not touch the base of the pool. Fast forward, i was the only child in my family who could not swim.
The life saver – Johnson was a nice man and encouraging but i still failed to learn no matter the amount of support i received. Some how, i was not allowed to drop the subject of swimming so i had to go to the swimming pool and hold the poles. i did this for many years.
I used to see smaller’ tuduntus’ – I have not better way of describing these babies that mastered swimming go past me but I WAS AFRAID. I was afraid of drowning yes but i was too afraid of learning with every one’s eyes on me or so i thought. I was moved into sharing this on my blog after reading Lutgard Musiime’s blog ( //lutgardmusiime.com/20-facts-about-me/) that listed 20 facts about her and her number 17 fact says ” She is afraid of swimming”
My mother at this point knew i would not learn with the eyes watching and so she devised this plan to get me to the swimming pool during off peak hours. So our usual drill was go to church for 11.00 am service and then go to the pool after 1.00pm. She changed it by ensuring we got to the swimming pool before 11.00am because no one was at the pool side at the time. ( Brilliant idea)
I remember her beckoning to me,” Joanne, swim, try, come to me.” I had developed trust issues over time because, the life saver – Johnson had a way of changing position after convincing me to leave the rail. My mother never gave up on me. We did this for many months. I still hear her voice as she often said, ” Joanne, do you trust me?” Ofcourse i did trust her but …….
Finally, after several attempts to swim towards her and i realized she wouldn’t change her position in her pool, i was able to leave the rail and swim to her. She only changed position with my permission. My trust in her grew stronger with each visit to the pool.
You may be tempted to think that i did not have other siblings with me. I did but that adjustment of time at the pool was made so that i could learn how to swim and my mother dedicated those Sunday mornings to me. Besides, my siblings already knew how to swim and took advantage of more space in the pool to extend their boundaries even further and try new tricks in the pool.
I finally learnt how to swim, to the deep end at least. I never ever competed in swimming but my mother did give me an honorary trophy just so i would have one on the shelf of trophies.
And that marks the end of my story.
Raising child number 3
So we had our first child in 2010. Bubu2010, was our first child, and the first grand child for my father. Oh, how loved he was. He was such a high light and my family related with him before he was born. He had toys of all kinds. You know how you buy age appropriate and inappropriate toys. HaHa. He was an amazing child, born in amazing times. He had so many photos taken of him than i can remember.
Fast foward to 2012, and in comes Tutu2012. A real soldier this one. Almost had no photos taken of him. By now, my family is not so over the moon any more. The first child just gets an overload and leaves none for the 2nd child. As parents we are trying to manage this new life and just keep afloat. It is amazing. I don’t even remember moments of his baby life. I am sad about this because no matter how hard i try, my brain seemed to shut out that segment. i don’t know if any of you has experienced this.
Seven years later in 2019, we had our 3rd child Puchu2019. And suddenly, our household is alive once again. I know God has been part of our search for fruit of the womb and He sent us this special child. I don’t know if the difference in atmosphere is as a result of where i am in God or just the sheer excitement of a new child or both.
You see i had my first two children before i was born again. We literally lived in the flesh. We disinfected our house and every thing much more than a hospital theater. Yet children still fell sick. We were in and out of hospital so many times. We just upped our disinfection game. We didn’t use bottles, children were fed using utensils that were sterilized but still, hospital was on a weekly.
It is amazing what God has done for us since we had Puchu2019. God has always been our ever present help and that is his nature. Its been one blessing after another. Blessings at our jobs, blessings at home. All our children are in good health, and whats even more, we are not sterilizing the house. I thought to myself, even children in areas that are not necessarily pleasant grow and thrive. My child cant fail to grow and thrive. Why? God is our ever present help. Psalm 127:1 says ‘Unless the Lord builds a house, the builders labour in vain. Unless the Lord watches over the city, the guards stand watch in vain.’ I have a new found freedom. Yes, we have had some issues, hurtful ones even but God has guarded us thus far and he continues to guard us.
I have not panicked about Puchu2019 only finding used part of toys and i mean used parts because we don’t have one toy car that has all its wheels. Some cars are just parts but he is a happy child driving his old parts. Don’t ask me about his photos. If it wasn’t for his aunt Vanessa who is living with us, child number 3 wouldn’t have photos but slowly we are building a portfolio.
Oba what am i saying. All i am saying is God has kept us in good health and Puchu2019’s good health is my testimony.
YESU Asiimwe.
The Breath of God
Abel’s encounter with The Holy Spirit surely changed the trajectory of this post and your lives forever.
This morning I woke up to another nightmare called life.
I’ve been feeling exhausted from all the public addresses on TV from the Ministry of Health and the president. The local and international news is like a never ending ‘end of times’ action movie.
It can’t get worse, right? The news of the loss of a beautiful angel made me want to scream inside. I had no idea what to tell her parents who found themselves suddenly grief stricken.
This month has been blow after blow, on us all. It begun with the loss of my unborn baby who I was just starting to bond with. I’ve been uncertain whether I should talk about it or not, but I feel being silent about it is not doing any justice to my sweet angel, sent from heaven and returning just a few months later. I don’t want to pretend she didn’t…
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Mother of Boys 